When 'Skinniness' and Mumbai locals meet...

Mumbai locals. Love 'em? Hate 'em? Cannot ignore 'em! And since I have to commute the length and breadth of the city, my 'skinniness' doesn't go ignored either!!

Random Day One:
Peak hour rush. It's the first thing in the morning but the sweat and grime of the humid city already makes the day unbearable. Add to that, the burgeoning crowded train.
So there I am standing, no wait, struggling to fit my tiny itsy-bitsy frame on one centimetre of floor space but it seems largely unaffordable. Irony.
What I have next to me is a rather large, healthy woman decked up in all her finery with her rounded elbows in my sides. I'm ignoring it. But just as I am soothing my nerves allowing the music to take over me, I 'think' I hear muffled voices.
My very 'ample' co-commuter seems to be speaking to me. I unplug and here's what ensued:
Ample Lady: "You are pushing me. Your entire 'weight' is on me. Why can't you stand properly? BLAH BLAH BLAH..."
A-very-Zen-Not-so-ample me: "Thank you"
Ample Lady: *Aghast* What do you mean 'Thank you'?
A-very-Zen-Not-so-ample me: Well, simply thank you. *Smiles*
Ample Lady: "Huh?"
A-very-Zen-Not-so-ample me: "How else do you expect me to react to you yelling at me the first thing in the morning. So all I have to say to you is 'Thank you'.
Ample Lady: *Stares ferociously*
A-very-Zen-Not-so-ample me: "Quit staring. Your station's here. Alight and get off" *Smiles*
PEACE ENSUED!

Random Day Two:
Same old Mumbai Local. Same old crowd. Same sweat and grime. Same old Not-so-ample me. Same old quarrel for one centimetre foot space. SIGH. But this time it's another co-commuter!
Co-commuter: "Don't push."
A-very-zapped-Not-so-ample me: "Just look at my size. You really think that even if I tried to push you I'd succeed?"
END OF DISCUSSION!


Random Day Three:
Same old...
Co-commuter picks on me because of my bag. It's a backpack. And I can be a snail with my house on my back on some days.
Irked co-commuter: "Look at the rush and look at this one (hinting at me) pushing around with her big bag. There's no space for the rest of us and here she comes in with her big bag!"
A-very-entertained-Not-so-ample me: "The size of the bag is to compensate for the areas that I lack when it comes to size."
SUCCESSFUL CLOSE OF DISCUSSION

Age Miracle

As a representative of the 'Skinny Genus', I continue to exist in the world that's too darn busy making fat people thin and chiding thin people for well, being thin! 

Every once in a while I have to subject myself to this tormenting routine which some other folks seems to thoroughly enjoy: Shopping! 

UGH! Sheer torture... 

Yes, I have ranted not so long ago about  how I never seem to find 'MY' size... But I was rather pleased with my luck (more than myself) a couple of days ago when I swooshed in and out of a store with a decent find. 

Most folks resort to retail therapy to get over other things that are bothering them. I, on the other hand, walk out of a clothing store and find peace by binge shopping at a book store! It's another thing that my wardrobe's empty while by book shelf is bursting at its seams!! 

So I'm walking in and out of stores the other day and decide to catch up on a movie. This movie now is apparently certified as 'A' by the Censor Board. (P.S.: At the end of the movie, yours truly just couldn't help but fathom the 'A' certification! Anyhoo, more on that at a later point). So yeah, I'm in the line purchasing tickets for the show and just as I announce the name of the movie, I'm told that I might have to submit my proof of age. Why? Well, in her words, "because it's an adult movie!"

Seriously? 

I'm standing there, stopping myself short of balking back at her and laughing out loud in her face because she's said it in all innocence. So I had to contend myself with just reconfirming her own suggestion back with her.

Oh well, I was never asked for any proof eventually... But yeah makes me think if things continue this way I'll have one more thing I won't be in need of -- anti ageing creams! MWHAHAHA 

The Good. Not The Bad Or The Ugly

Being skinny aint been all that bad. In fact there are countless experiences where I didn't have to retort or hang my head in shame because of my not-so-ampleness

Just for the records, I am in my early 20s. 

Yeah, so getting on with those thank-god-I’m-stickly-thin moments.

So here I am walking into a lift or walking down the road or just bumping into acquaintances, people my folks know, people I haven’t seen in a really long time (or maybe it should read as people who haven’t seen me in a really long time!)

Well...we meet. We greet. Surprisingly enough these people are warm. Hardly ever has anyone of these sub species made a caustic remark about physical frame (one more reason to like -- no wait, love these people)

So they ask me how I am (see, I said they were nice)...about my folks... 

And then quite innocently I get asked which "standard" I am studying in ("standard" got replaced by "which year" about 24 months ago). 

It's during those moments that I cannot help blushing. But I have to suppress that stupid grin (These are nice people, remember?) And I have to then sound all modest and propah minus any tone that would strangely enough make it seem like I have been slighted. 'Cuz I haven’t. 

That's where I begin to tell them what exactly I am doing. More specifically how "standard" isn't quite where I’d fit.

And as far as "which year" goes, no sooner do they mathematically calculate my age, I realize that i can now no longer stop beaming...

A day in the life of U-know-who! ;)

Incident # 1:
Person A: Hey! Nice top. You got it stitched?
Me: Thanxxx. Nope, I've picked it from a store.
Person A: Ooh! And U've really lost weight!!!
Me: *here we go again* I actually wonder if there is any more weight for me to lose!?!


Incident # 2:
Long lost relative A: Hi! How are U doing?
Me: Hey!! I'm doing good. How have U been?
Long lost relative A: I'm fine. So U have a pretty hectic schedule, eh?
Me: *not knowing where this convo is leading* Yheaaa...kinda.....
Long lost relative A: Hmm. And U've lost weight!
Me: *stopping self from rolling my eyes out* Huh? Did I have any to lose in the first place?
Long lost relative B: No! No!! She looks much better than the last time.
Me: *confused as ever*


Incident # 3:
Colleague A: Tell me one thing...how do U lose weight?
Me: *slightly startled but just smiles*
Colleague B: Take tension and U will lose weight
Me: *still smiling*
Colleague A: Arrey i put on more weight when i'm tensed
Me: *binge eater*
Colleague C: We (referring to Colleague A) will put on weight when we are under stress and she (referring to me) will lose weight when under stress!
Me: Trying wearing loose clothes :P